Thursday, March 8, 2012

That is one half empty glass!

Members of the medical community collectively need to work on their poker faces. After a night in the emergency room, tons of blood work and an ultrasound with some of the most sophisticated technology known to man, I have had the following conversation several times in the last two days:

Medical Professional (MP): *happyface* The hormone levels are low and we're not seeing what we'd expect to see on an ultrasound at this point, but that probably just means your dates are off!
Me: *straightface* We conceived through IUI. My dates aren't off.
MP: *sadface* Oh.

Forgive my relentless practicality, but at this point I wish they'd just call it. Instead of confirming what I already know and taking steps to hurry things up, I have been ordered on bed rest until things have improved for 48 hours. Or, and this part is unspoken, they get worse and I end up back in the hospital. Until they confirm a miscarriage, they treat this as a viable pregnancy. This means nothing but regular strength Tylenol for the pain.

I'm a little sad but mostly OK. I don't tolerate pain or limbo very well, and lying around all day gets old pretty quick. I'll be glad when it's over so I can start the process of healing and moving on. And, more importantly, trying again. Sure, in a hospital-induced moment of feeling morose I considered giving up on Operation Kid 2.0 permanently, but I just wouldn't be me if I let one little setback stand in the way of something I want!


Neeroc said...

I'm sorry you're in limbo at the moment. I've been there, it's a horrible place to be. Take care of yourself over these next 48 hours, I'm glad to read the baby-making will continue in one form or another *g*

Lydia @ On The Verge said...

I'm sorry that you are in limbo. I wish you had answers. I hope everything works out. Take care of yourself.

Susan said...

I am so sorry. Being in limbo really sucks (for lack of a better word). I'll be crossing my fingers and toes for you. xoxoxo

revelations said...

aaah.. the famous limbo..which you learn in the second year of medical to delay,put off,spin the inevitable....I'm with you just smack up me the side of the head and get it over with... setbacks make scoring the winning goal even sweeter...:)

revelations said...

ahaaa.. that should be smack me up the side of the head...sorry I had a male moment fingers were typing faster than my brain....

Unknown said...

Limbo. That is tough, and waiting is worse. My prayers are with you.

Just Jane said...

You've been on my mind for the last few days. Thank you for the update. And I'm sorry (but glad to see a spark of fight in you).

Alexandra said...


I am so sorry.

Do you have an update for us? I was on bedrest for 4.5 months with all 3 of my children.

They still came early: at 31.5 wks, but they're teens now.

If I only knew back then that I'd be alright.

All that worry.

Playoutsidegal said...

Urgh... I'm sorry I didn't check in sooner to see how you're doing. Waiting is horrible, especially if you think you might get bad news. : ( Fingers (and toes and everything else bendy) crossed everything works out!!!!!!!! Hugs!!

The Host said...

Neeroc, thank you. It's a lousy club to be a member of, but I'm glad I'm not alone.

Lydia, thank you. I'm not in limbo any more so I guess that's something.

Susan, thank you for your kind words.

Robert, I get that sometimes they just don't have all the answers, but I also know that false hope is not great.

Kathy, thank you. The wait is over now, but the news isn't better.

Jane, Thank you. We had to know the fight would make it's way back sooner or later.

Empress, thank you for your kind words. I will be alright, but I'll have to wait for another story for my happy ending.

NM, thanks hon. I'm afraid finger crossing didn't work. I'll give you a heads up sooner next time so you can try to work some magic. :)