The one where she talks about adding another year

Last year I spent my birthday in an airport. This year I started it off in a long, long line to renew my drivers' license. "Happy Birthday! That'll be $75 please." You know, I really have to do a better job of planning this shit.

We were supposed be on a fabulous vacation to commemorate the 10th anniversary of my 28th birthday, but this pregnancy has had enough drama so I thought it prudent to stay a little closer to home. Hooray! Local waterpark! Don't knock it, my kid's unbridled joy in the water is just an awesome sight to behold. We were supposed to leave Monday but The Husband had a scheduling SNAFU. I pouted for a bit and then decided since I already booked the whole week off I would celebrate my birthday with gusto! Insert something about lemons and lemonade here.

First I was presented with a gift and a card signed by The Husband and M, who has mastered all of the letters in her name. Because she is brilliant. Then I went to see my good friends at Service Ontario. OK, that's just a necessary evil, but my next stop gets us right back to gusto as I treated myself to a lengthy prenatal massage and savoured the free lunch the spa offers on one's birthday. By myself, with nothing but a magazine for company. Time to myself in absolute quiet! I followed that up with a mani/pedi and a free birthday latte from Starbucks. Best. Birthday. Ever.

Alright, so my idea of a celebration with gusto differs somewhat from what would have come to mind 10 or 20 years ago, but it was a damn fine day. And now, I will take to my bed and allow the post-massage glow to lull me off to sleep.

This post is written as part of GBE2 - Week #92 word prompt: Gusto. For more info about GBE2, click here.

Things I forgot about pregnancy #1

I know weird side effects come with the territory, and the joy of these little people once they're out makes it all worthwhile. But damn, there are some weird things about pregnancy. And you get this really weird amnesia about it when you decide to do it again. Probably because the human race would die out if women could remember all the things that make pregnancy so ludicrously uncomfortable.

For example, round ligament pain. I bitched about it during my last pregnancy. More than once.

Somehow this memory vanished in four years. I can remember the phone number of my best friend in elementary school who moved away at the end of grade 4, so I know there's nothing wrong with my memory. Yet there I was, sitting on the couch minding my own business when I got up to pee. Again. The sharp, stabbing in my lower abdomen pain upon standing was damn near blinding. I was paralyzed with fear for a few seconds, pretty sure something had gone terribly, terribly wrong. Then *poof* it was gone. What the fuck was that? Oh, that's right. Breathtaking pain is just "a normal part of pregnancy as your body goes through many different changes."

Well that's just great.

I've forgotten all about the pain of labour too, but I'm pretty sure some helpful site will remind me that it's just a normal part of pregnancy as my body goes through the process of expelling an 8+lb parasite from the confines of its host.

Play the name game with Nametrix

When I was young and had no intention of having children, I decided that in the unlikely event I did have a daughter, her name was going to be Victoria. I made all of my friends swear they wouldn't use my name. Ummmm, M is not named Victoria. When the time came and I was trying it out talking to the wriggly little baby in my belly, I just wasn't feeling it. I had open abdominal surgery during pregnancy and needed her to be strong to get both of us through the ordeal, so I named her after the most ferocious woman I knew - my grandmother. It just... fits. Luckily a quick analysis of her name shows she's likely to be employed in the arts and a liberal. She'll fit in here just fine.

HOW did I analyze her name? With Nametrix, an app that has analyzed the names of millions of real people and their professions to tell you what people with that name do for a living and how they vote, statistically speaking. Naming your kid is hard. Their name on a resume or online dating profile could be grounds for immediate dismissal one day. Finding out too late the name you picked has girls working the pole in disproportionate numbers is just not cool. OK, so you probably shouldn't base an important decision like your child's name on some fun facts from an app, but it's still a cool way to pass some time.

The Husband will be pleased to learn that the leading contender for P2's name is shared by a good number of computer scientists, engineers and mathematicians. Who are also liberal. It's like we'll each have a kid of our own!

This is not sponsored content. I received no compensation for this post, I just think Nametrix is cool.