Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Finding Nemo

SEASter Egg Hunt - Aquarium of Niagara
He's in there... somewhere. I think. Behind the Easter Egg? Or maybe he was in another tank. You know, after a while they all kind of look alike. But let me tell you, to a three year old, the sight of seal (sea lion?) swimming around a pool with a ball on his nose is officially The Funniest Thing Ever.  If you're in the Upstate New York/Southern Ontario area, the Aquarium of Niagara is just the right size for little people and a great time can be had by all. If you happen to be suffering from a devastating hangover because you and your partner dipped rather heavily into the wine the night before your kid decided 5:30 was a great time to start the day, you can be in and out of there well before the decibel level of hoards of children makes your eyes bleed. Feel free to file that one under "Good to Know" and you're welcome.

Also, since the souvenirs aren't the "officially licensed" ones, you can get a clown fish that a little kid will swear is Nemo for $15. I don't know if that's a good deal or not, but I do know it got us the hell out of the gift shop before I completely lost my shit, so I consider it money well spent.

Apparently a single visit to Niagara Falls can make a trip to Build a Bear a "thing." The Parasite picked the bear's name herself, and we have the birth certificate reading "Teddy Bear Queen Falling Bear" to prove it. I know, letting it become a "thing" was a newbie mistake, but watching her try to carry the box back to the hotel herself was worth its weight in gold.

Friday, April 6, 2012

Goals are good

If you found this post as part of a search for self-help type info, I'm afraid you're going to be very disappointed. I'd apologize, but I wouldn't mean it and really, insincerity harms us all. Better luck next time? Like most Type A people, I make a lot of lists and I set a lot of goals. One might think I relax this mindset when it comes to my kid. That would indicate one does not know me very well at all...

While at the zoo one day when The Parasite was very small, I noticed that the fish tank held her attention better than the mammals could ever hope to. I attempted to test this theory with a trip to Seaworld when she was a little older and was very disappointed to learn that the "aquarium" they speak of on the website was really a couple of large fish tanks in a gift shop. I'm sure the whale show is fascinating, but the wait was too long.

No matter, I had another opportunity a year later in the Bahamas. The fish-fascination held and an idea was born. A quick Google showed there are about 50 aquariums in North America. I resolve to take The Parasite to most, if not all, of them before she leaves for University. We're going to do a lot of traveling anyway because we love to, so seeing some fishies while we're at it seems as good a reason for a trip as any.

Last summer's road trip took us to the Aquarium of New England. A trip to Southern California one day will cross about eight off the list, and we'll hit the others as it strikes our fancy. Like the one we'll see tomorrow on our Easter mini getaway. Will the fascination with the fishies hold for long enough to see all 50? Only time will tell!

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Money for Nothing

I've been getting a lot of inquiries from PR firms as of late, and while the attention is flattering, I'm rather stunned by the lack of professionalism displayed by some agencies on behalf of their clients. Pitches asking me to do something for nothing are particularly baffling. Oh, I see. You'd like me to run a campaign including a blog post of a few hundred words with links, keywords and several pushes on my social media properties - activities that will take somewhere in the neighbourhood of two hours of MY TIME - in exchange for a sample of your client's product. One which has an approximate retail value of $5.

Just so we're clear, I assume you're going to pass the savings from the donation of MY TIME on to your client, who will in turn pass those savings on to the consumer. Therefore you're asking this altruism of me for the betterment of society, right? No? Yeah, that's what I thought. You're working the cost of MY TIME into your proposal to the client and then asking me to work for free. That's just not cool.

Look, I have a full time job that actually pays pretty well. I spend my days launching products with campaigns including several promotional pieces, links, keywords and multiple pushes on social media properties. Sound familiar? I do this in exchange for MONEY, because at last check that's what babysitters, stores, banks, utility companies. etc., are dealing in these days. If I want your client's $5 doodad, I'll buy it. If I think it's great, I'll tell the whole world. If I think it sucks, I then have the option of returning it or petitioning the manufacturer for a refund. I might choose to blog about the experience, but I have the option of not blogging about it too. The best part is that I'm not beholden to anybody but me!

I found this article interesting. It states the average parent blogger earns less than $1,000 a year for their efforts. The 64 cents per hour quoted in the article is a bit misleading because it assumes all blogging activity is intended for commercial purposes, which I expect is not the case for many bloggers. For example, I prattle on endlessly here because it's cheaper than therapy and because I want to show the world how adorable my kid is as I do my best to ply her will ALL of my neuroses. It's a hobby, not a means to feed, clothe and house my family.

However, it does mean there are a whole lot of people out there doing something for nothing. If you are one of those people working for free or something close to it, it's none of my business what you do with your time. I happen to think I deserve to be paid for ANY work that I do at the request of someone else (The Husband and The Parasite aside), but maybe you don't agree with that sentiment. Therefore you're welcome to take the following advice with a grain of salt.

I would recommend that every blogger that reads this post and is approached by a brand or an agency estimate how much time will be spent working for that brand or agency. Then compare that time spent to the minimum wage for your province/state/country/whatever as a starting point. If the agency or brand you're thinking of working with is offering you less than that amount in actual cash money (i.e., not product, unless your local phone company happens to accept shampoo samples as payment), SAY NO!

I ask for compensation that is in line my hourly rate at the office, because I'm doing similar work and I know I'm worth it. And so are you. Demand payment for your time, because every minute you spend doing something for nothing for somebody else is another minute you don't have to yourself.