Saturday, April 30, 2011

How does it feel?

I have always been the type to cry during movies. In 1994, I took my then six-year-old cousin to see The Lion King. When Mufasa died, he was the one to console me and assure me that it was only a movie. Bell Canada commercial where the kid calls his war vet Grandpa to tell him he's at Dieppe? Tears. The last episode of ER, a show I hadn't watched in about five years when it ended? Bawling away. My screen-induced crying is a source of great amusement for The Husband, and that is because he is a soulless automaton.

There's a show on AMC called "The Killing". It's a gritty crime drama set in Seattle and it's a really good show with mystery and political intrigue and all that interesting stuff. It's well written and well acted with realistic portrayals of the major players in the story. And I have a terrible time watching it, even though I really want to know what happens. You see, the plot focuses on the murder of a teenage girl, the detective investigating her murder and the aftermath of her death on her family. In every scene with her mother, I feel it a little too much. Sure, it could be that Michelle Forbes' performance is evoking a heavy empathetic response... But it's more than that. It's yet another "quirk" I blame on The Parasite.

You see, as I'm watching that show, or really any show or newscast where bad things happen to children (The Lovely Bones? Sobs. Recent story about a missing deaf, mute autistic little boy in Quebec? Couldn't sleep.) my mind instantly goes to how I would feel if that was my baby. Being a mom has made me feel things more deeply. It's hard NOT to put myself in someone else's shoes, be those shoes real or fictional. It has basically ruined murder mysteries for me forever. Thanks, kid.